He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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