we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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