Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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