don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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