Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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