I think i peed on brittanys purse
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
