ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
i think my cat just said my name.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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