Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
