Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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