Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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