is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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