WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I'm like, not good at living.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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