I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
