Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
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