he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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