That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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