ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
