Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
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