is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Randomize
