i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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