i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
