I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
wow bdsm is so cute
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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