Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
