I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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