i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I got inside last night via doggy door
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Randomize