I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
