Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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