If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
