he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
