oh god the rape fog is back!
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
