woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
