The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
