He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
