I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize