What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
