I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
