I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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