Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Randomize