U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Just invented taco cereal.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
