Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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