It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
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