I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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