between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
two words: eviction party
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
