I bet he comes in French.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
