yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
My balls are so social today.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
