don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I understand Curling. That high.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Randomize
