i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Randomize
