After last night, I could never be a politician.
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
