operation harelip BJ is a go
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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