Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
