At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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