with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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