I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
